64 and counting...

So. . . I have done it again! I've moved again for the 64th time. This time was under circumstances that's for sure but it'll be for the best I'm sure. This time was in rapid time! I started packing my car at like 1115am and people showed up at like 1215pm.... we were done moving stuff by like 330 and I was able to feed them and socialize a little and be totally unpacked by 830pm!!!! pretty much impressive! I won't lie. I did one load of laundry actually two. So I have clean sheets and I have zero boxes left to unpack. I have to clean my old apartment which should be fun (note the sarcasm) and move Bob. Life is pretty amazing. I'm not sad, well not very. I think I'm gonna really enjoy living here! I'm really digging my new room. I also LOVE LOVE LOVE the fact that I have nothing left to unpack. How crazy is that? I have things to rearrange i'm sure. But other than life life is gravy!!!! Ok I'm spent and need to sleep!!!

night!

jko

back from the dead

I had someone ask me.... why haven't you blogged in forever? My response. I've been busy. God that's the most ridiculous thing i've ever heard. So Here I start again four months later... but I have nothing to say right now. Amazing I know :) But I will this weekend I'm sure.

jko :)

Back to the beloved ROUTINE

It's been almost a month since my return from Brazil and I have yet to blog. Not because I don't think i have anything to say or the time to say it in I just have too much in my head right now and lack the focus to start.

A lot of my thoughts are spent on the future. They always have been. I am that child who looks to the future. Today, I am finally thankful for where I have been, more thankful as the years go on. Perhaps it's the realization that I am getting older. During just the past 3 years (not to mention the past 27 before that) I have done amazing things, met fantastic people, learned more than I could ever imagine and more importantly I am so very blessed. Daily I am blessed.

I can also look to the future and see the great things that are going to happen. I can envision the places I will go, the new career I will have and all its success, the children I will one day have, the life I will have and the love that will continue to grow within me for those around me.

Where I am at a loss is clearly seeing the present. Living in the now. Experiencing the here and now. Appreciating every moment that happens. The analogy I can give you is this. I plan these vacations in great detail and have great fun planning them. Then when I am finally in the country of wherever it seems I begin planning the next trip instead of truly enjoying the days I am there. I also find it difficult not to let my expectations of what the future has to hold not to mess with my present. You know the moment where you are disappointed because something does not happen according to "plan". My plan is not a plan it's more of a hope. I would like to think I'm flexible and in fact I am loving the detours that my life is always taking me down.

However, on all the detours that I willingly go down I wonder... will I every truly enjoy what is happening now. Do I have that capability of it? Or will I forever be looking to the future? And then thankful for my past?

The falls that never end....

Our adventure continued to Iguassu. We went there for an amazing adventure. I have video of this its truly amazing!!!! The falls are gigantic and border Argentina and Brazil. We started with a jungle ride, then a boat trip to the falls actually going into the falls and then a hike to to the Brazilian side of the falls. Then we went to this bird park which as much as I hate these types of things was fantastic!!!! The falls themselves are trying to become one of the seven natural wonders of the world. I am totally speechless on the complete awe of this natural wonder. At the devil's mouth, the point where the waters meet the most beautiful rainbow crossed the water... truly magnificent

We went to dinner in Argentina that night and yes I managed to find a casino. Too funny! We taught this very young brazilian couple how to play video poker. hahahah oh the influence I continue to be. The entire two days was fantastic. Finished up with a morning laying out at the pool.

Today we woke up Bruno made us breakfast and we laid on the beach drinking Caipirihinas. It was amazing out there. The beach is so much different here in Santos. Unlike the golden soft sand of copacabana which is also horribly dirty this beach looks as though someone watered it and the beach was spotless!!! And the water was fantastic. Today we had the most amazing paella in the planet!!!!! Both of us sunburnt monika went to the mall.... again and I hung out with Bruno.

I'm tired and found an amazing keg of beer :) hahahaha Minus my bout of wanting to vomit for an hour (yey for me and food poisoning) and Bruno's semi-broken thumb (a mishap with the fan) today was/is the perfect way to end vacation. The rain started late this afternoon and the thunder and lightening is FANTASTIC!!!!

This blog lacks pizazz but I have the most amazing photos from our trip to iguassu that do not require words!!!

See you in a day or so!!!
much love, jko

Sweet Jesus that~s big!!!

Grimall Dan took us to two vista points that were amazing. You could see the entire city of Rio de Janeiro. While driving up to see Cristor Redentor aka Corcovado he sang and danced with no hands on the wheel. Mon thought we were going to die. This was an amazing drive!!! The big Jesus gets worked on twice a year bc it is made of soap stone and of course it is being worked on right now. Scaffolding everywhere. Too bad. But it was still pretty amazing!!! The hike up the mountain not so amazing hahaha.

I understand why everyone comes to see this monstrosity. Even covered in scaffolding this was breathtaking and a moment in time I~ll never forget.

:)
jko

did somebody say samba?

So... the story continues. 6 am sleepy and non-motivated jamieko is walking along side Monika on the infamous Copacabana. Do you realize that at 6 am in Rio that the pre req for being on the beach is the ultimate desire to exercise? Makes no sense to me. I love running but come on now! Even when you~re not directly on the beach when you are on the sidewalk beside the beach you need to run forrest run!! hahaha.... So anyway after a walk on the beach that is not any better than any beach in California, full of cigarette butts, trash and smells like dog piss (i mean really i even saw a syringe ew!) we were stopped by two older gentlemen shouted to us, CUIDADO... CUIDADO... clearly this means be careful but whatever they said after was lost to both Monika and myself. They repeated it like 3 times to ensure we understood. We however, did not understand and now I was just paranoid and grumpy. I told Monika, who was grumpier than I, that this was her show and that she needed to lead the parade. She was offended by this, clearly I lead too often if this is a foreing concept. But after she had three cups of coffee and a snack we were good as gold and letting the adventure begin.

Walking the streets of dirty Rio we found post cards and a hotel where we could ask for directions as the cab driver made us a bit paranoid about taking other cabs. BUT i did learn one travel tip I had never thought of... make sure they are real cabs, in Brazil the real cabs have red license plates, a cabby license in the window and a taxi light on the top of their car. That was cool. Anyway we found our way to Pao de Azucar, Sugar Loaf Mountain. We took the bus there and I followed the cable lines as we went trying to figure out what to do next. I was not sure where we needed to get off and I suppose the look of puzzlement on my face was good enough bc the guy behind me tapped me on the shoulder and said in hand signals get off here. I laughed he pointed and we thanked him. When we walked towards the cable car we were able to see the raising of the flag, friggin cool in any country!!

Walking up the steps to buy our tickets we are approached by some short pudgy man with a fantastic smile. Laminated map in hand he explains to us how he can take us to see Cristor Redentor, big jesus (ok i~m sure thats not what that means but heck it is a big jesus) hahaha, and from there we can see the entire city. Monika looked at me for approval and I said it~s up to you. I~m down for anything. He spoke to us in Spanish so we could understand him better and she said she wanted to and we were off.

Sitting in the back seat I prayed like I~ve never prayed before, please don~t let this man take us to the jungle and chop us up. hahaha... well His name is Grimall Dan. Now if you look this up online you will see why I had no reason to worry. This crazy ass man belonged to a samba group and was very proud of this. He danced and sang the ENTIRE day (pretty sure monika thought of biting this poor man to get him to shut up. He danced and sang at the top of his lungs and just kept trying to get monika to dance. I smiled, took photos in the back seat and danced my little heart away. When I get home I will have to learn how to upload videos because it is pretty much as funny as it gets. In fact you can go online and see other people~s videos of him. He was LAUGHS!!

Clearly God was looking out for us because any residual grumpiness was gone and our heads and bellies hurt from laughing so much.

jko

Boys

My dad would hate that I called this boys. He hates that. Jamieko these are grown men you are talking about. Makes me kinda laugh.

This isn~t about Brazil. Just a side note something I was thinking about.

I have a lot of boys in my life. I am blessed to have so many of them as very close friends and the rest I can turn to if I ever need anything. Most of them have come to me for girl advice or I have come to them for guy advice. or simply we can just hang out and enjoy one anothers company like I was just one of the guys (or they were just one of the girls hee hee)

If you have known me for any amount of time you know I struggle with the question, can men and women be friends? I~m not sure why this is such a hard thing but it is. My conclusion. It is more difficult when a sexual relationship has been involved. Or when someone has fallen in love with the other. That complicates things and makes it difficult and quite frankly impossible. I have a strong rule. If you are in the friendship zone you will never get out. It makes it totally possible for me to maintain platonic friendships with people of the opposite sex. I~m still working on the rule for the exes... right now it seems its just not possible.

My question of the night??? All of my close guy friends have freely told me they love me and I have reciprocated. Why is that so easy and when they are trying to tell the women in their life that they just like them it is as if they were losing a limb? I find that if men could be as honest with the women in their life as they are with me, relationships could be so much simpler.

I understand the risk, the vulnerability is not there with me but come on, these women love you back and they deserve the honest truth even if it~s not so pleasant. Or maybe they don~t and i have lost the ability to read people. In either case, why is it so hard for people just to be honest with their feelings? look like an ass! You have no problem looking like an ass in front of me. Be the real you because the real you is going to come out eventually might as well find out if she likes it.

It seems that every man has been hurt by a woman and now he~s scared but every woman has been hurt by a man and now she~s scared. So now you guys just go around with a wall up that cant be torn down and in turn you just hurt someone else. Now which came first, the chicken or the egg???

I would hope you have enough sense in yourself, enough faith in yourself and enough trust in the woman YOU chose that you could stop this. MAN UP!!! :)

risk it! it~s fun, or so i~ve been told.

jko

side note, very creepy guy just sat down next to me and won~t stop staring. Sir I DO NOT want to be your friend. hahahah

the wheels on the bus go round and round

I already told you we had an adventure on the city bus. Always fun. I don~t care if you~re in El Paso or if you~re in Beijing, public busses say a lot about a city and you see it from such a different light.

After we successfully purchased our tickets to Rio we encountered this man who spoke fairly good English. We were asking him to show us back to Bruno~s house. Side note, when Monika entered the country the man says, miss where are you staying? To which she says, with Bruno. To which he responds with a smile, everyone here is named Bruno. My name is Bruno and I know you are not staying with me. That made me laugh. Anyway. This man stops us in the middle of our pleading for help and he says to Monika, I must tell you thank you. Thank you for all the great music your country has made. The Rolling Stones, The Beatles, (and he named others I was too busy laughing to hear). He was super sweet and got us back on the bus we needed.

Back to the bus... So I have never traveled at night. Well I think maybe in China but does that really count??? I am now a HUGE fan. i mean seriously. Travel to a location from 9pm to 6am... you sleep. You~re not missing anything and you wake up and get to start going. Awesome right? The bus we were on was even AMAZING!! we had our own foot thingys (yes I said thingys) that allowed us to totally stretch out. Well I am 5 foot nothing so maybe it allowed just me to stretch out. The driver even gave us blankets and pillows, smashtastic to say the least. We were all set, even kinda tired from the day of walking and all that jazz. Relaxing, lights out, headphones on we were off. Now had I not been next to the child with night terrors, or naturally a light sleeper I might have slept. But this was not my destiny. I was awake 95% of the night. I have never really slept heavily but this was misery at its finest. I always thought maybe it is because I have too much estrogen. Have you ever noticed when a guy goes to sleep he~s OUT!!!! I have never slept that hard, not even after a HEAVY night of drinking. Still sleep like I~m listening for a small childs cry.

Anyway we arrived bright and early to Rio de Janeiro, the one place I did not want to visit at 6 am without me having slept but maybe 10 minutes. Not the way to start a trip. hahaha. It amazes me that my silence is so often misconstrued as passive aggression rearing it~s ugly little head. People, I do have the capability of just being tired and having no desire of speaking.


jko

connect the dots la la la

I was hoping that some magical internet god would have magically posted the blog I did last night, but alas no such luck.

Patience was tested all day Monday and Tuesday. First we couldn~t purchase plane tickets and had to do that at home. Let me rephrase that, Bruno had to do that at home. And it seems as though our travel arrangements took probably 6 hours. Pretty much half a day. Oh well day one Monika was going to kill Jesse (our travel agent) and by day two I was done. It was nice we took turns. I love when I finally called Bruno, like he was my dad and I was trying to keep from stopping my foot in tantrum mode, and told him we were stillllllllllll waiting. He told me I was stupid for waiting I shouldve called him earlier and give Jesse the phone. Two minutes later Bruno in his so eloquently spoken way says. There system is down like it always is in the shit country. hhahahah that made me laugh. But patience prevailed and we got what we needed (note, being however many days later it turns out the two hours we waited for this paper were totally wasted hours because no one has asked for them lol)

However, if I have to return to the mall one more time for anything I might shoot someone for sure. So hopefully no more money is needed & no more travel plans. Mon can go shopping by herself as I lay on the beach working on evening out the strange tan I have going on right now. The tan and the 6 bites i have going down my leg. I think if you connect the dots it makes the little dipper. I~m not sure but I~ll have to check. I still cant figure out how I~m the only one being eaten. Oh well such is life.

I wonder what will efficiently take the itch away from the red marks down my leg???? hmmm
jko

insert sad face here

You don~t have to be a genius or know a lick of Portuguese to know that line that said Nao... meant that my my last post didn~t post and it didn~t even get saved.... so sad. Oh well. Guess I~ll just write later after the hot tub!!!

jko

rio de ja what?

hahah Bruno continues to mock me for blogging but I think he enjoys it just as much as we do. But he told me I couldn~t blog yesterday, so given that it is his computer i didnt. But tonight we are off to Rio. Which is not what I had particularly wanted to do but it is what you do when you travel with others, compromise. Hopefully I~ll find a computer while we~re out there.... but tonight we take a 9 hour bus ride to Rio de Janeiro, spend the day at the beach and looking at big jesus, and then we~re off to the falls....

Ok... side note and quickly bc i~m being glared at hahaha. We ventured on our own to give Bruno a break from us and to go buy our tickets, a whole other story. But in doing so we took the bus. Seriously if you ever want to get to know a place hop on a city bus. You get to know the people and the place pretty quickly.

A younger woman with a child in a stroller asked me politely if i could get up so she could sit and feed her child. Of course I agreed and yes I still don~t speak Portuguese. So she sat down and whipped out her tata and started feeding this 2 or 3 year old child. Yes I was amused and it needed to be noted. However, not as amused as the guy who got the driver to pull over to let his child pee on the street. The poor 8 or 9 year old had stage fright and it took forever but low and behold he whipped it out and did his business and then we continued on our way.

Interesting day nonetheless. Looking forward to the 9 hour bus ride, did i already say 9 HOURS??? oh well just in case i didn~t mention its gonna be a long trip!! hahaha

Note to self, if you are going to wait to make travel arrangements till you get into the country you should perhaps remember to bring a dictionary with you because there is the slight possibility that every, yes EVERY travel agent might not speak English. Oh yesterday was a LONG day. We love Bruno and his computer savvy ways and more importantly his translating ways!!!

Best part, walking to the mall, where the travel agency was, an old man stopped us and said to me in Portuguese you really need to get her more sunblock, she needs to get out of the sun. It was funny. Poor White Bread.

:)

the lesson of the day.... sunblock

I'm starting to get slightly confused on my days. Not because there is some sort of giant time difference but more because there is a feeling of double days. You know those days where you go out and do stuff in the morning, come back chill out and then do something at night. So you are lucky enough to get two days in one.

Today was a pretty lazy day. Bruno hung over from the night before had to work so Mon and I explored the town on our own. We walked 3 or 4 miles down the beach just talking and walking and enjoying girl time. It was not as hot nor as sunny as it was on Saturday but I reminded "White Bread" that she should put sunblock on anyway. It was an amazing day we have such great conversations. Everyone needs friends like this.

I've seen a lot of beaches in my time and this one was by far the most exercise oriented. The sand packed because of the rain and the water warm. The beach lined with chairs and umbrellas and dark, very dark people in bikinis and underwear. It seemed that 1 out of every 10 people was jogging. It was nice to see. What was interesting to see was the lack of fabric on all the people walking the beach. As we walked back we couldn't help but begin to judge bums. It was humorous and involved a lot of random photos of half naked bums. I tell you the photos from this trip crack me up.

Anyway, when we got home we dragged Bruno from his laptop and he took us to lunch and then the mall. Why would any man voluntarily take two women to a mall???? Such a sweet guy but really such an idiot. hahaha. We walked through 3 of the five levels in and out of almost every store. I thought he might shoot us instead he picked on us like a good little brother. Totally unsuccessful shopping trip we walked back empty handed and got rained on for the second time today.

As the night progresses and our energy ceases to exist we notice that both of us are cherry red and have intriguing tan lines. Having yet to put on a bikini and both of us have the burn from hell. At least it'll be an interesting tan.

I'm pretty sure Monika is bored and wants to go paint the town red, but given that it's Sunday the town is pretty much asleep. We ordered pizza, which let me tell you was amazing and very different, drank a shit ton of Stella and now are watching From Paris With Love. Pretty mellow night. So that is our goal tomorrow, to find somewhere Mon can get wild and have fun. Hopefully sunblock will work tomorrow!

I'm excited about our boat ride tomorrow and buying all the plane tickets and such for leaving Santos. :) Little things make me happiest.

jko

oh Caprinha

So after we took a nap and chilled out watching stupid movies such as Borat (seriously I went this long without seeing it and leave it to me to go to Brazil to see it), we went and explored Santos. After four too many Caprinhas and way more Brazilian food than three people should ever eat we were drunk and happy on the streets of Brazil.

The rain started to pour and the thunder and lightening commenced which made it a very fun night. We walked on the beach in search of unsuccessfully for another cantina for Monika. It's fun for me to watch the two of them go at it, the three of us look like dysfunctional siblings. It's HILARIOUS!!! Today is still cloudy and White Bread as Bruno calls Monika, is elated about that because she is already pink from the hour we spent at the Farmer's Market.

After our adventure I decided that the smart thing to do involved running up fourteen flights of stairs to prove that I was faster than the elevator. Sad to say but I was wrong and couldn't find my inhaler to rescue my huffing and puffing.

Bruno is a computer geek much like my dear friend Mike but even more so. He downloads all kinds of fun stuff, so instead of watching regular cable we watch tv and movies he's downloaded. My two newest loves, Tosh.O and Chuck, super fun for me. And it's in English hahaha.

The best part of traveling for me is the strange way I understand what is being said to me in foreign languages when I don't understand the language at all. Like last night I told Mon that our waiter said this and she says, "How'd you know that?" Bruno chimes in with "yeah that's right but how the hell did you know he said that?" Oh the joy of being observant! Makes me smile :)

Ok we're off!!!
jko

Hi my name is Jamieko and I'm an addict... . :)

So I'm sitting in Brazil in an apartment that looks out on the beach and I'm pretty jazzed as I sit in a puddle of my own sweat!!!! :) I got to the airport this morning a good 45 minutes early which was great because I had a great night and a great morning! So I was able to sit there and just relax, reflect, eat, and call people who have been waiting for me to return their phone calls. Clearly God is testing me and my addiction to my cell phone. It died as I crossed security. I realized though this morning that not only do I have a strange addiction to my phone as I searched for outlets at every airport, but that our TSA people in the MRY airport might not know much about passports as he tried to read my Brazilian Visa instead of my actual Passport. I made it through three airports only ALMOST missing one of my flights. I definitely need a watch when the cell phone dies. OOps.

On the second flight I almost stabbed the small child who continually kicked my chair for an hour and a half until I politely told the mom to keep the child from doing so. As I boarded the third and final flight from Dallas to Sao Paolo I realized I might be in for a long trip as the four teenage boys sitting next to me talked about getting drunk on the flight. Luckily the boys passed out as soon as the plane took off. There was nothing more horrifying to me as I made a list of things we might do while we're in Brazil (yes it began to freak me out having no plans), than realizing I had no idea how I was going to find Monika or Bruno and slightly began to panic. To my great relief I found Bruno and Monika both waiting for me where I walked off the plane and we were off.

Our long drive from the airport to the beach side town of Santos, where Bruno lives was a nice scenic route. IT's fantastic to see Monika and Bruno. Two people whom I love deeply and find great pleasure in seeing. These are two of the only people who can tell me cut and dry how life goes. No sugar coating, not glamour, just plain and simple This is HOW IT IS!!!

We met his mom and then went to the supermarket, an experience all of it's own. We saw the farmer's market today and experience heat like no other. Ate fantastic Brazilian creations including sugar cane milk and saw things that I'm not sure I can define (you'll have to decipher from the photos). And stopped to have Caprihnas, a traditional Brazilian cocktail (holy geez) yes it was only noon but hey it's all good right? We're on vacation. :)

I think the funniest conversation today.

Me: So Bruno, when are we going to meet your girlfriend?
Mon: Yeah Bruno when does she come to town?
Bruno: Oh you're not meeting her. I told her I was out of town. She's crazy. She cried when I said I was gonna be gone for the week.

Too funny. One of my best friends in the world and so horrible. :)Communication at it's finest So now we chill trying to plan the rest of the night. We've decided that while we're at the falls we're going to go see Argentina and Paraguay!!! That is an added surprise!!!!

I'm not sure how long I can live without my phone but since it's dead looks like it'll be till at least the 29th. (only mild withdrawals happening). I won't lie Mon and I are thoroughly entertained by Meg, the baby bulldog in the house!!! And Bruno's mom is gonna show us around later this week while he's working!!!! Looking to be a great trip!!

jko

What should we call the Day After St. Patty's Day?

I wonder, the day after a "holiday" always feels like such a let down. Like you have this tremendous build up and then you wake up the next day and nothing. Almost as though someone pissed in your Cheerios. I had so much fun last night!!! I won't lie I often think I bartend because I have more fun watching people than being one of them. Don't get me wrong I have fun being "one of them" hahaha. It's just more fun to watch the chaos and the stories unfold.

Like the guy sitting at the bar who proceeded to hit on the chick next to her. Slyly getting closer, gradually touching the small of her back and then watching her flip her hair and "accidentally" brush her boobs on his shoulder. It's a fun dance to watch. The sloppy drunks, the loud drunks, the rude drunks, the fun drunks, the designated drivers trying not to lose their cool, the socially awkward friends being dragged out to yet another situation to make them uncomfortable, the men hoping to get laid, the women hoping to find "the one", the friends coming out to party and have fun and then the friends just coming out to cause trouble!! Luckily and more important THANKFULLY St. Patrick's Day is a great "holiday" where everyone is loving life and everyone is happy. It's as though the green dye that I add is laced with a dose of happiness. No one ever gets mean on the day of the Irish and I love that. I also love where I work and 99.9% of the people who walk in the bar. So I have a good life!

However I did get worked last night and am still lacking in the motivation to do anything. I think I have most of my ever-growing to do list done. My bag, yes bag, not bagS packed and if i'm missing something then looks like I'll buy it. One more final in 3 hours (maybe I should start studying hahaha) and then I'm DONE!!!

This would be me excited... :D Doesn't happen often but here it is!! :) In 20 hours I'll be leaving on a jet plane!! Focus Jamieko you still have one final to do!!! :)

jko

Vacation Mode

I've never been a proponent of "Vacation Mode". You know that mode you get into when you have already "checked out" from reality and stopped all productivity even though you are not yet on vacation? For those of you who know me you know my level of anal retention that I do possess. I'm normally fully packed at the bare minimum three days before I depart house spotless, car cleaned, all laundry done, everything ready for me to come back to a house and life of peace and tranquility. This way the last few days I have nothing to worry about before I depart. I leave in two days and this is what my living room looks like. Four large piles of laundry on my carpet not anywhere near my suitcase. My car still has to visit the car wash, I have to clean my house again and should prob attempt to clean my fridge just to avoid the science experiments when I get back home.

My growing to-do list just seems to be non-existent in my desire to not accomplish it. Worst part is I'm sitting here blogging instead of doing anything. It is nice to "chill-ax" as my nieces say. Not really stress about anything. Life is good! However, at some point I will need to get this all done and I work tonight and have class tomorrow night. Leave it to me to even plan things during the daytime hahaha oops.

I wonder when it will hit me that I have ZERO planned for this vacation. I have a plane ticket, a book on portuguese and will at some point soon have a packed suitcase. That's it. No plans, no hotels (I'm staying with Bruno and his girlfriend in one place but no others after that), no itineraries, nothing, just a suitcase full of bikinis and books and one pair of party shoes.... note to self, must find sunglasses and buy suntan lotion! Ah summertime in March will be fantastic.

We'll see how this works out for me :) Alright time to attempt packing.

Happy St. Patty's Day!!! I'm hoping it'll be busy so this night of drunken debauchery goes by very quickly especially since I'm only a sober witness to the joys of what is happening. Well I am THE reason for the drunken part, but still....

Have a great night!!!!

PS... did you notice I learned how to upload photos!!! Very exciting.

jko

The Never Ending Smile

Today I found out that the weather in Brazil is well, AMAZING. Steady 80 + degrees and loving it. There is a possibility of thunder storms sunday/monday. That I think might be just as cool!! It rained a lot when I was in Hawaii and it seemed as though it was just a means to cool off. I'm getting jazzed!!!

I wish the pile of clothes on my floor would sort themselves and hop magically into my new luggage but I suppose I'm not that lucky. I do hope the last three days before vacation I can be more productive than today!!! One more final and then I'm off like a prom dress!!!

Life is good!! Sarah would be happy for me, so it's time I begin to be happy for me.

What a great week!! Tomorrow is St. Patty's Day. So much drunken fun to be had and to watch!

jko

I LOVE YOU SARAH

On the final day of February of this new decade I was informed that one of my closest friends died in a tragic car accident. The past week has been full of tears and sadness, and happiness and joy. She was my sister and my friend. She was my joy and my sanity. I gave her hope and direction and she balanced my ride on the crazy train.

My faith was tested and I was mad at God and his choices. She had reached an honest level of happiness and then was taken from this planet and I do not understand why. However, it seems as much pain as this has brought me he has blessed me with so many great things this week. So many amazing things that I just want to tell her about. I go to text her everyday and realize with tears that she will not be there on the other end laughing with me and sharing her latest joys and trials and tribulations.

I pray to you every night and I hope that you can hear me. I pray that I do not feel guilty for my happiness because i know that you would want to see me finally happy, honestly happy like you were in your final days.

I love you, I miss you more than I realized it was possible to miss another person. You were what I felt was my final connection to the other sisters. Now it is time I reach out again.

UCAFLIAS!!! I promise i'll stay off the crazy train just for you.

jko

Happy Single Awareness Day

Valentine's Day is an intriguing "holiday" to me. It's a Hallmark holiday only around to make men feel inadequate for not living up to some Harlequin romance novel version of what a woman is to expect on February 14 and to remind single people of the fact that yes they are in fact SINGLE. I can have this opinion because I have always had a significant other on said holiday. Well minus the first holiday after I filed for divorce.

You know the one where a group of my friends decided to take me to the Mucky Duck, a watering hole in Monterey, to go hang out. Not only am I not a fan of bars but I'm not a fan of this bar and there were a ton of people there. So as my claustrophobia and whatever social phobia I might have begin to kick in they ALL proceeded to leave me at the fire pit, alone. With only my now watered down cocktail and the warm fire to protect me. For the first time in God knows how many years I was uncomfortable and almost started to panic but then realized, whatever I'm smashtastic and hell I drove them here. Ha sucks to be them.

Then at that moment the guy next to me who without me noticing had slyly creeped (yes creeped) up next to me. He turns to me and says, "So, how you doin?" I looked at him trying not to laugh nor be totally turned off by the absolute look of fear on his face, smiled and said, "Well I just got ditched by my friends so I guess I'll make the most of it. I'm Jamieko..." I shook his hand he introduced himself. Too bad his name was forgotten shortly after he said it. He entertained me and the night was not lost. No wait... it gets better :) My barback ran over (I work across the street) and brought me a rose, a single white rose and said, "I heard you were over here, I thought you could use a flower to make you smile." I melted, realized that I had the best friends ever and didn't mind sitting alone by the warmth of the fire and the company of the friendly stranger.

I digress. I still think Valentine's Day is a horrible holiday even though I have been lucky enough to have someone to spend it with. So many men get so much flack for not buying flowers or chocolates or a card. All of my exes have loved me because my take is, there are 364 other days out of the year you should show me love, not just this one. So as long as you're doing that, then you're off the hook. :) Don't get me wrong, this girl will never turn away a loving card or flowers I'm just saying you don't have to feel like you are obligated. But remember I will turn away chocolate because I do not care for it.

This year will mark the very first year I truly celebrated Valentine's Day (well one that is memorable any hoo). I spent the afternoon with friends at a musical supporting another friend. Then the evening with the boy, who until he becomes more defined will remain known as, the boy. We talked, we cooked, we talked, we cooked, we kissed, we enjoyed each other's company. It was like every other Sunday we spend together (Sunday being the only day I have off) except he entered my apartment with a hug, a warm kiss and potted daffodils, golden yellow ones. He says, "I hope you like them, look there are two of them." So sweet, so gentle, so romantic.

We made a first attempt at risotto, wild mushroom-scallop risotto at that, cedar plank salmon with mango salsa, and asparagus (frozen in a bag steam me via the microwave, very bad idea, asparagus) and giant chocolate covered strawberries. A night of fun and relaxation that everyone should have. I gave him a card and some boxers and he gave me daffodils, we cooked dinner together and watched Couples Retreat.

Simple I suppose but still the most amazing Valentine's Day I have ever had. No unrealistic expectations, no bitter underlying unfulfilled desires, just two people totally enjoying every minute they have together. That's what the day should be about. Not flowers, candy and cards, but love, well perhaps not love yet but for sure deep like.

:) hope your holiday was great

jko

who am i?

I used to write poetry all the time. Hell I used to write all the time and now feel the need to get back into it. Sitting in my Saturday class in my notebook I found a poem I wrote 3 years ago and thought wow, I should start again. This is it

Who Am I?

I'm the child who made my mom stop after she hit a pigeon and then I nursed it back to health.

I'm the child who wanted to be a doctor but the adult who didn't have faith

I'm the person who can do anything but chooses to do nothing

I'm the female who will stop at nothing to make you happy but will sit in silence in misery

I'm the 27 year old who's never had a one night stand, doesn't have any regrets and has never used alcohol as an excuse for anything

I am the girl who talks to her dad at least three times a week, sometimes three times a day

I am the employee that's had more jobs then I am years old

I am the chick who has trouble finding and maintaining female friendship

I am the person to find the newcomer and make them feel at home

I am the one who has trouble saying no

I am the bartender who can make you feel like the only client in a busy bar

I am the flirt who you can say anything to and I'll smile

I am the caregiver who will nurse you back to health

I am the clepto that let my brother get blamed for things I stole

I am the granddaughter who was abused

I am the tomboy who has no trouble keeping up with the boys

I am the counselor who helps you through the bad days and celebrates the good ones

I am the best friend who you can call at 230AM scared and i'll calm you

I am the homebody who knows how to have a good natured good time

I am the poker player who knows your tells before you open your mouth

I am the daughter who's patience for my mother has worn thin

I am the wife who didn't know how to ask for what she wanted

I am the girlfriend who's devoted to your every need

I am the student every teacher dreams of

I am the woman trying to become a lady

I am a lady uncomfortable in her own femininity

I am the child that everyone thought would succeed, the woman that everyone turns to for everything and the person who is trying to find herself . . . can you help?

Dad's Fantastic Analogy

Jamieko, it's like you have this fantastic 5 day vacation all planned out in Florida and you've arrived at the airport. On the way to your gate you keep stopping at different airlines checking them out. Oh, maybe i'll go to New York instead, how about Texas? If you keep stopping and lose focus you're going to miss the plane to your dream vacation.

I love my father sometimes he hits the nail right on the head.

jko